violet against women

About Me

This is an artwork in progress. This durational, site-specific project explores and documents my studio practice, professional and family lives, and the myriad interdisciplinary and cultural sources that influence and define my identity as an artist, curator, and mother. I’ll share other artworks in progress, artist interviews, found youtube videos, and other web miscellany that, using humor and theatricality, confront traditional, cultural expectations of women.

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    Judith Butler Explained with Cats

    AWESOME. Oh man, as if performativity wasn’t already way difficult to comprehend, I now have to grasp at the theoretical staging by cats. I’m more of a dog person. 

    Berlin Barbie bummer; feminists protest Dreamhouse opening

    As usual, the comments below the story proove to be more illuminating to the larger issues of how women, feminists, and damn it, Malibu-nites are perceived and represented.  It runs the gamut here. I think of grey Berlin skies and really wonder what made them choose this particular project for this location. This could easily read as part of some contemporary art Bienniel, and you read it here first, if this project comes to fruition, this site will become a favorite among performance artists around the world. 

    In fact I propose that a full performance art festival take place at the Malibu Barbie Mansion. Hmm…who to invite? Well, we could show Martha Rosler’s “Semiotics of the Kitchen” in the kitchen. I think a three act opera staged in the basement could be appropos. Something really dark. How about some gender exploration here. Ryan Trecartin? Zachary Drucker? How about a male feminist artist? Why is it that those artists are found in places like Scandinavia or Austria? I think of dark skies. Remember the Barbie song? “I’m a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world…” Weren’t they from Finland or some such place? 

    What about some archival intervention of the Barbie archives?! That could be interesting. Displace the pink cupcakes. Either way, if such a place will exist, I might attend if I happen to be in Berlin, and they’re having a half-off discount on ticket entries, and I just missed the last train out of town. Still, the chance and opportunity exists for subversive intervention by regular ticket holders. Don’t wait for the Bienniel invitation. 

    Suspending Weight and Belief in the Works of Heizer and Bourgeois

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    The spectacle of a giant rock slowly moving through Los Angeles last spring was as exciting as watching the space shuttle Endeavor circus also move through Los Angeles (at a snail’s pace). That is to say, not very. Online you can find amateur editors placing the Benny Hill soundtrack over sped up footage of these monoliths being pulled through the city. I find these immensely more interesting. I’ve visited Michael Heizer’s Levitated Mass a few times at LACMA. It’s a 340-ton boulder supported by two points on either side of it’s bottom surface. By the project’s very title, the expectation is that one should feel the monolith’s inherent contradiction of immense weight and possible suspension. Each time I visit, I stand beneath the rock and wait to feel it’s magic. 

    Unfathomable weight concedes to hopeful buoyancy. Does it hover above mere mortals on the ground? Not exactly. You’re never not aware of the two supporting shelves and ledges on either side supporting the rock. If there is no atmospheric sense of the rock floating, then at the very least, this (mild!) hypochondriac wants to feel a little threatened or unsafe.But I feel no sense of urgency or vulnerability, either my own, or for that of the rock. There’s no threat. If the viewer neither feels any sense of vulnerability or fragility, then the scale and the weight of the rock become obsolete - weightless. In this sense, I suppose it’s neutrality could be considered a levitation between earth, human, and sky, but this feels an ambitious reach. Conceptual weightlessness?

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    If you consider the spider sculptures of Louise Bourgeois, such as Maman, creeping and crawling over skylines, public spaces, and museum galleries, the suggestion of vulnerability comes from all sides, be it communal fear, fear of bodily harm or just good ole’ institutional critique. The spindly design of Bourgeois’ spider’s legs appear weightless and ready to move. With these examples, both artists manipulated natural materials to create atmospheric impossibility. Pragmatically of course, it’s production is wholly possible if given institutional and financial support. Immense scale and weight are meant to intimidate our sense of singularity and to compel us to check the fragility of our own humanity - our own ego. But without Heizer evoking this sense of fragility within ourselves (or for the rock), there’s a conceipt and self-satisfaction inherent in the rock that won’t promote the aid of impossibility. Afterall, we stand beneath the rock, looking up at it’s support system, a decidedly un-magical levitation.

    Levitated Mass by Michael Heizer at LACMA: http://www.lacma.org/art/exhibition/levitated-mass

    Levitated Mass driven through LA: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6DoJOwTqCxU

    Endeavour’s Trip across Los Angeles with Benny Hill theme song soundtrack: http://la.curbed.com/archives/2012/10/here_is_shuttle_endeavours_trip_set_to_the_music_from_benny_hill.php

    Louise Bourgeios over downtown skyscape: http://gallantandjonesblog.com/2012/02/13/inspiration-louise-bourgeois-25-december-1911-31-may-2010/

     

    In the Midst of a Warzone there’s an Afghani Skateboarding School for Girls

    RARE Angelyne sighting! 
It’s becoming increasingly rare to catch glimpses of Angelyne while driving the streets of Los Angeles. You used to be able to see her out and about with her hot pink corvette (or mustang). Greg was fortunate enough to capture this. Someone told me she’ll charge you $10 if you ask for a photograph with her. So many rumors about her role in life, but she was an icon of LA, through the 80s and 90s. She was an OG celebrity for celebrity only. Remember her billboards? 

    RARE Angelyne sighting! 

    It’s becoming increasingly rare to catch glimpses of Angelyne while driving the streets of Los Angeles. You used to be able to see her out and about with her hot pink corvette (or mustang). Greg was fortunate enough to capture this. Someone told me she’ll charge you $10 if you ask for a photograph with her. So many rumors about her role in life, but she was an icon of LA, through the 80s and 90s. She was an OG celebrity for celebrity only. Remember her billboards? 

    Senga Nengudi on Youtube Videos, Pina Bausch, and Finding Family in Collaborative Practice

    With so much popularity surrounding social practice and artist responsibility, it’s timely to draw attention to issues experienced by artists who have children, and how they manage to balance their family and professional lives. Is there a stigma attached to artists who have kids in regards to how galleries, curators, collectors, and institutions view your time management skills? With so much emphasis on social responsibility in the arts, perhaps parenthood can be more clearly understood as an act of humanity in the arts. 

    I was in Denver recently and sat down with Senga Nengudi to talk about her early works, her experience with the feminist art world in 1970s Los Angeles, and how she negotiated the responsibilities of being a mother while being an artist. A lot has been written about Senga’s work but I  wanted to hear more about how her experience as a mother informed her work and studio practice. We worked together on a show that I curated (and that she graciously agreed to be a part of), and I had the chance then to become more aware of her overall body of work. 

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    Feminist tones are easily read in Senga’s work, but I wanted to know how about her experience in the 1970s Los Angeles feminist art world.  Did she feel that feminism had been inclusive of women of color? Retrospectively viewing feminism’s failure to address the experiences of women of color isn’t new. Was there a breach in women’s collective experiences? 

     Her influence on younger artists like Clifford Owens for example, can be seen in a recent performance at MOMA PS1. Owens created a performance from one of Senga’s previous scores.

    Continuing my trajectory of making cross-disciplinary influences more transparent, I’d been thinking a lot about dance and it’s influence in the performance art world. I’ve interviewed many performance artists who listed dance as an influence (in fact many of them had traditional art degrees) as they applied action to the body during performance. Senga too has a BA in Art and a minor in dance which perhaps is why she so easily finds rhythm in the autonomous body whether the body is sited in a wheelchair or on an urban street in 1970s Los Angeles.

     Read on for the interview:

    Interview with Senga Nengudi and Ellina Kevorkian on March 27, 2013.

    Will you talk about your experience with the 70s feminist artist community at The Woman’s Building

    Superficially, I felt welcomed by feminism but felt feminism was disconnected from the Black and Latina experience, who namely, were bringing their children around with them. During the early 70s, I felt like a token - there for “color” - not on equal footing. I think so highly of artist Nancy Buchanan. The sense of privilege and entitlement weren’t there with Nancy. There was a sense of true collaboration, not the need to be in control at all cost. 

    How did having children influence your work?  

    Well basically as with most women, their first birth is quite something and I was just amazed with the flexibility of the body and how the body changed in so many ways, physically and emotionally. So when my first and second sons were born, that almost one’s body could go back into the same form, I really wanted to find a material that expressed that experience that I was going through. I had my own issues going on, you know, I was stressed, and all that kind of stuff. And as I looked at the stretching of the body, I also looked at the stretching of the psyche and how that really can stretch as far as possible, and come back into shape as well. So I just looked and looked and looked. I finally came upon the pantyhose. When I first started using it I tried everything. You know, there’s this issue in the art world, of it having permanence. I tried resin, and I tried glue but it just didn’t do it for me. Then I added the sand and it added the sensuality and the form of the body. Finally I just said screw it (archival permanence), I’ll go with the nylon mesh, pantyhose if it feels right to me. So it was triggered by my body’s changes, when I was pregnant.

    How did you maintain being an artist and a mother at the same time? 

    It wasn’t easy. I think about Suzanne Jackson (a painter), she was the first black female in LA to have a gallery, Gallery 32. She also had a son about the same time. You know, we were trying to work it. We were being told to wait until we had raised our kids before having a full career. You know, we weren’t hearing that. I couldn’t see myself just waiting and not being my fuller self as a wife, mother, and artist. My husband has been totally supportive of me from the beginning of our relationship. 100 percent supportive. It would do an injustice to most of my friends who were single mothers, if I didn’t mention him. There’s a distinction between a woman having to hit it on her own and not having any support system, and having a husband. I want to honor him as well as honor my friends who were doing it on their own. So, I just managed it. I just did it. (laughs). I don’t know how we did it because everything was tight then. And that’s when these collaborations were so important. You know we could count on each other to be there. Filmmaker, Barbara McCollough was there for me always. I did this piece called Rapunzel. I just happened to pass on Arlington and (I think) near Pico, this Catholic school - all bricks - really beautiful school. And they had decided to tear it down and it had been in the community forever. I just happened to pass by and saw it and thought oh my god, this can not be! So I ran home and got some materials and I called Barbara and said you gotta come and take some photographs so we can document this moment. And fortunately she did, and that she was available. I went into the place while they were literally demolishing it. Behind me there was this little tower thing and I just stuck my head out, like Rapunzel out of a fairytale. So that’s an example of all of us being there for each other. 

    Did you ever bring your children with you on these site-specific projects?

    Yes, most definitely. They were there. And that goes back to my (earlier) issue about The Woman’s Building. Me as a mother, I had to take them with me. And not only had to but wanted them to be with me to have those particular experiences. 

    Did you have family around that you felt you could rely on? 

    Yeah. My mother, my grandparents were alive at that point. And there was the family of friends, so to speak. So, it’s like we were all just there for each other. It was just how it was.  The whole birthing thing from start to finish is just amazing and that’s what pushed me into making that work and then, it just evolved into other issues of the body. And it only seems like it’s more so today, this issue of un-satisfaction of the body, or body image, and all that kind of stuff. 

    Would you say that RSVP was directly about your children? 

    No, it wasn’t about my children. It was about the processes of the body. We as women experience things that men really can’t, in terms of physical body and what it adjusts itself to do, whether its your period or preparing for an entity to grow inside of you, these are things that a man couldn’t experience. So it was about the process. 

    Did you feel any negative stigmas attached to being a parent in the art community? 

    Oh yeah. And at that time, it was really there. There were really successful women artists at that time, and it seemed that most of them didn’t have children. I mean that it (not having kids) was a choice. And that was fine. But no one understands the actual experience of being a parent unless you have done it. Now, I feel like things have changed some. Men seem more willing to do more in the partnership. I’m still delightfully surprised when I step outside and see a man pushing a baby stroller along with having a baby strapped to his back. You didn’t ever see that when I was raising my kids.

    Can you talk about the cultural influences on you while living in Los Angeles?

    Back in the day when I lived near Adams and Western, on 24th street, there was an Italian villa (The Williams Andrews Clark Library) that had been donated to UCLA as an off-campus library. The villa was a stunning space, restricted to use by scholars only. However, anyone could walk the grounds and its magnificent gardens. It felt like you were going into another world. Across from it there was a Buddhist center and there was a small man in Buddhist garb who would go around the neighborhood, beating a drum. 

    What year was this? 

    1980s. I thought he was so courageous, this Japanese man walking through the neighborhood way down Adams, past Western.  You would hear, BOOM BOOM BOOM!  Sometimes because of traffic and street noise, you would only see the action of the beating of the drum. In my mind, it was a performance with significant meaning, spiritually and physically. It felt as though he was somehow blessing our neighborhood. That area was a significant influence on me - I grew up around USC. As an adult I lived further west off of Adams, in Sugar Hill. That area was really important. During its hey day it was where creative energy lived. It was an area where professionals and top entertainers resided, since at the time Beverly Hills had a color-code.Nellie Lutcher, the jazz musician lived there at one time, as did the Mills Brothers and Eric Dolphy.

    Have you heard this album recorded in Dolphy’s parent’s Los Angeles house in 1954? Is this around the time you were in the neighborhood?

    No. Marvin Gaye’s parents’ house where Marvin was shot was two blocks away. Black cultural history couldn’t have been more condensed than in that neighborhood. Horace Tapscott and his Pan Afrikan Peoples Arkestra had a rehearsal place on Western, just north of Adams. Barbara McCullough is just completing a documentary on Horrace Tapscott. The almost black Johnny Otis lived just off of Washington Blvd. Music and clubs, clubs and music.

    I grew up listening to Johnny Otis on my mother’s kitchen radio.  Like so many others, I’d assumed he was African-American. Thinking of rhythm and African traditionalist qualities in music, did you ever experience his voice apart from seeing him. Was there a moment before you knew his color, that you experienced the disembodied voice? 

    Actually even when I saw him I just thought he was Creole. Now I listen to KUVO, a jazz radio station out of Denver. I get to listen to it when I drive from Colorado Springs to Denver. You can only get it online in the Springs, but on the trip up, I can get it on the radio. Today I was listening to an amazing trombone solo of Amazing Grace. It wasn’t just jazz. Interestingly enough it seemed to blend, spirituals, rhythm and blues and southern soul. Historically in traditional African music, the drummers cued the dancers. They set the beat. They let the dancers know which spirit is present to be honored, experienced, channeled.The power of music in all its forms in Black culture is deep. With jazz, it’s about improvisation, where the known dissolves/evolves into the unknown; the collaboration between musicians stimulates the next musician to stretch higher. That concept is my guiding force.

    What do you do to inform your creativity, now, in the studio? 

    I’ve been trying to stay in the moment. With my students, I give an assignment where they have to go out and be acutely aware of every sense. It’s enriching to engage all one’s senses. What it has to offer is new information. Sometimes by being in the present I feel like a super-person or super-hero with heightened abilities. I came to engaging the senses through smells! Which is difficult because smells can take you out. You inhale them and they can be so toxic that they can kill you. But then other smells can take you to states of euphoria and blissful memory recollections. I recently read a bestselling advertising book on how to sell a product. (Brand Sense by Martin Lindstrom) If you incorporate all the senses you have a better chance of gaining brand loyalty. For example,Coca-Cola has its’ trade mark bottle shape, distinct smell, and taste. It’s an issue of how we take senses for granted, at a subconscious level. The field of our experience is taken in on an unconscious level as society is becoming more and more numb. 

    Your body of work encompasses both still and active considerations of the body. Sometimes it’s performative motion and other times, your fixed sculptural pieces (like RSVP) can read as body parts that hold both stillness and allusion to movement. You’ve said that you interacted with those pieces, moving around them, manipulating them. Were others allowed to interact with the RSVP pieces or was it only you? 

    With those particular pieces it was just me. However there were times when I created pieces and applied materials on my collaborators with the request that they activate them through movement.  Check out my website under collaborations or the website aapaa.org.

    Are there other artists you feel address their own work with similar considerations of engaging the senses, drawing attention to the moment?

    David Hammons is exceptional! He had a show at Ace Gallery, “Concerto in Black and Blue”, 2002. You entered a space with no light. It was pitch black. The walls were painted blue.  When people came into the space, they were given tiny handheld keychain type flashlights to guide their way. It was a disorienting experience and the viewers had to engage all their senses to center themselves and navigate their way through this cavernous space. It wasn’t until the lights hit the wall that they discovered that the walls were painted blue.  As the flashes of light hit the walls they were in essence creating the piece through their own personal experience.  It adds deeper meaning to the phrase “you had to be there.” 

    Are you familiar with Noah Purifoy’s work? He was in the Now Dig This! show at the Hammer. I love his work. He was Director of The Watts Towers Art Center when I was there in 1965. At that time I was also working at the Pasadena Museum. He was such a visionary! Some years after that he made the decision to leave Los Angeles and all that meant and moved to the desert in Joshua Tree. It is worth the time and the drive to make a pilgrimage there to see the massive body of work he created. It is there for public view. He’s the real deal! He wasn’t interested in playing the game. He was purely and truly an artist for art’s sake. He should have had a more significant present in PST (Pacific Standard Time, an initiative of the Getty where over 60 spaces focused on California art history. Now Dig This! was an exhibition of African American art produced in Southern California between 1960-1980, also a part of PST.)

    As your older work is being celebrated and re-presented in a historical context, how do you feel about re-performing or re-performances in general? 

    The whole “re-” thing…there’s no way you can do it. You can’t recreate exactly a performance or even the headdress for the show we did together.  The conditions are not the same that created the original piece. You bring something different to each performance - you have to let it go. Like the performance at MOMA (Kiss), you can bring a similar but not exact energy, so we just decided to do our own thing.So yes, I’m philosophically opposed to EXACT re-performances given for historical consideration. 

    Going back to Now Dig This!, would you have framed any differently, the African-American works that were in that exhibition?

    That’s a good question. I think Kellie Jones did an excellent job dimension-jumping from one realm to another, and sensitizing people to all the different issues and themes those artists were dealing with at the time. She set a really good foundation for those works to be experienced. Kellie just won the “Best International Thematic Museum Show” this year for ”Now Dig This.”  It is a true crowning moment.

    When you describe engaging all the senses, being present, I hear the same rhetoric of being in the moment used in theater and other creative processes.

    Yes! Acute presence is a Buddhist and even Christian concept. These ideas I have about being present and engaging the senses…they’re ideas.  There are always ideas up there in the air that at any given moment, the same idea is plucked down by a number of people.

    You’ve spoken about having some training in Dance; do you keep up with contemporary dance? 

    Oh yes. You know I was so upset when Pina Bausch died. I loved her work and when she died I was like, why did you go and do that? But I don’t think she was one to hang around just to be hanging around.  She was all about the work.  I find dance really exciting right now. I’m excited about this pedestrian kind of dance where any body can move and that every human being has the ability to dance. The way each person moves through the world is completely unique.  It so fascinates me!  Just for the joy of it spend a day observing folks in motion as well as yourself. Who needs a stinking stage to see a concert! Smile. The other day I was on YouTube feeling so moved by videos of dances by wheelchair-bound dancers.  Ah inclusion. It gives permission to us all to experience the joy of movement. That does not diminish the poetry of a skilled, trained dancer/choreographer or dance company at their best; such as Trisha Brown, Alvin Ailey or Pina Bausch.  In fact, it heightens that experience.

    Having some dance background and making performances that embody movement and energy, could you see incorporating more dance in upcoming works?

    Oh yes. I was so pleased to be in that most amazing Dance/Draw show curated by Helen Molesworth. 

    I hear from your responses a recurring theme of autonomy and the body from Noah Purifoy, who removed himself from the business of the art world, the Buddhist who wandered the neighborhood beating the drum alone, and the private experience of wandering the library grounds. But also tradition features in your work. Are there any other arts that you feel embody a similar experience?

    That’s a good question. I love outsider/folk arts. They have a different set of rules. There’s the removal of ego, again a Buddhist principle. They’re doing what they are driven to do, called to do. Toni Morrison said she doesn’t bother to write or succumb to the outside pressure to write until she’s “moved” to write. She doesn’t bother until the story and the characters will not be denied and force their way out. These artists create when they have the spirit, and evolve in their own way.  They’re not concerned about being a part of any system. 

    and on the use of tradition in your work…?

    I save letters friends send to me. And then at significant times, I send them back - key ones that tell a tale. Talk about Blackmail…”girl, I saw Johnny today - he looked so fine…” (laughter) It’s giving a gift. With RSVP, I was responding - wanting an interaction. I love an artwork when it draws me in. Such as Aboriginal paintings of dream walking- there’s rhythm and communication between the artist and whoever looks at it.  I like art best when I’m mesmerized and drawn in and an exchange happens. It’s like intercourse. When art and viewer are engaging and have an exchange of energies, it’s like a third thing happens (like a child).  There is a part of the viewer that opens and their own original/creative thought is generated. They (the viewer) are somehow different, moving forward.

     

     

    Dolly, Orlan, and that Well-Intentioned Fresco Defacing.

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    This candid photo is one of hundreds of Dolly Parton on tour during the early 70s. A photo album filled with photos such as these were found on EBAY. The unknown photographer took privileged shots of Dolly backstage - in empty hallways and in conversation. Wearing a rhinestone slave bracelet and a big blonde wig she picks banjo with 2” fingernails.  There’s a soft-lensed blur and a yellowy-green tint associated with faded photos from the 70s. 

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    This pre-surgery image of Dolly resembles a prayer card you’d find in a church or perhaps she could be a Guadalupe or Selena, whose depictions are effigized in LA store-front Botanica murals…Saint Dolly of East Tennessee and of lonely hearts everywhere. She admits her persona and personal style emulates the town prostitute where she grew up - an interesting class confluence of both Magdalene and Our Lady. 

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    Like the recently well-intentioned defacement of a historic Italian fresco, Dolly’s facial alterations in present years record ambitious Orlan-esque renderings.  Orlan, who enacted a series of performances in which multiple plastic surgeries transformed her face as closely as possible with the aesthetic ideals of women from iconic paintings and sculptures in art history, conversely renegotiated the value of those standards by later implanting saline pockets above her eyes. I suppose her performative act also makes the point about female objectification and the privilege of the object in art history. 

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    Dolly’s iconic face has undergone similar surgeries to perhaps more closely resemble her former self at the apex of youth and professional heights. The woman behind the italian fresco, Dolly, and Orlan in some way refresh public spirit through personal transformation. 

    1. Dolly: Private Collection

    2. http://blog.onbeing.org/post/14211271949/celebrating-the-festival-of-our-lady-of-guadalupe-in

    3. http://returningcatrachoreport.blogspot.com/2010/02/to-live-and-die-in-la-murals.html

    4. Italian Fresco: http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/.a/6a00d8341c630a53ef017c316ba9e9970b-pi

    5. Orlan: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQ1Ph-Pprj4

    6. Dolly: http://www.celebritynetworth.com/richest-celebrities/singers/dolly-parton-net-worth/

    Micol Hebron and Reverse Engineering

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    It was all very well to say `Drink me,’ but the wise little Alice was not going to do that in a hurry. `No, I’ll look first,’ she said, `and see whether it’s marked “poison”or not;

    `What a curious feeling!’ said Alice; `I must be shutting up like a telescope.’

    - Lewis Carroll

    Included in Micol Hebron’s exhibition Reverse Engineering, closing this week at Tom Jancar Gallery, a three-hour long performance We are Here For You engages the viewers in an enduring confrontation by fifteen young women smiling silently from around the gallery space. Once I locked into a gaze, I turned my head quickly to escape engagement only to find another forced smile staring me in the face. By the end of a three hour performance, what does a three hour smile communicate to anyone? The usual connotations of friendliness, allure, and invitation aren’t so easy when a smile is held up by the charley-horsed muscles of the laugh lines.  Abject expressions of smiles and cries delivered by this performative context are made irrelevant to their normally associated emotions. The control over one’s feelings are waived.

    In the next room, Hebron’s video Reverse Engineering runs looped in a darkened room in front of a single sitting chair and table, upon which sits a bottle of whiskey and glass. There are multiple takes of Hebron sobbing miserably in front of her computer’s camera, her anguish palpable, her facial expressions bravely unedited. Jump cuts take us to the next crying jag. Same despair, different outfit. This is a misery that endures. The boldness of her searing emotions captured by webcam (a nuance that Hebron celebrates and could never have missed) made me laugh aloud. Why did I laugh? I don’t know - because she sat me in her chair and offered me a (her) glass of drink. Because watching her cry, I wondered why is she so unhappy? And then, I asked the same of myself. We’re looking at each other now, or perhaps I’m looking in a mirror. Because I too experience heart brake on both the minute and monumental scale. We aren’t as isolated as we think. Hebron offers a hand for holding and to be held. I laughed because laughter is my most natural response to upset and tears. But anger usually follows humor! So I laughed. She looked so miserable! It was hysterical! Lol! What happens to your emotions when recorded, played backwards and forwards, then continually looped? When cries become yelps, which become gasps of air, sounding like sobs. The thing is, I couldn’t differentiate between the sounds of my own laughter from her continual weeping.

    In Playlist For A Love Lost/Lost Love Hebron’s anguish is almost no more primally expressed than here, her mp3 playlist burned to CD (the modern day mix-tape). Hebron offered the CDs to anyone who wanted one. Shall we step back to my adolescence for a moment? Wasn’t desperation the primary reason for creating these Cyrano de Bergerac attempts - using the voice and words of another because self-criticism decreed your voice and words were simply not good enough, not pleading enough, and not even seductive enough to get your message pushed through the scrim of indifference, avoidance, or unknowingness. The playlist, a gesture of our most raw emotional developmental stage, was in fact the ultimate expression of unarticulated love, passion, anger - hate, even.  

    I imagine that those who aren’t able to read the humor in her work could regard much of it as an exhibitionist plea, because let’s face it, we can’t all be comedians with profound sadness. But there’s profound depth here provided by Hebron’s wall of emotion. It stirs us or, perhaps it leaves you unsympathetic. Either way, you’re asking yourself why. And you’re probably aware (or maybe you’re not) that this emotional rawness exhibited by a performance artist using the action of the body - the body as a medium - relies less on the semiotic long-run. Instead Hebron asks you to be present in the here and now alongside her. If you didn’t get that, it’s ok. That’s what the playlist is for. And she gave it to you for free.

    Songs For a Lost Love

    Disc 1

    1 I Fink U Freeky, Die Antwoord

    2 Love You Madly, Cake

    3 Little Bit, Lykke Li

    4 Give a Little Bit, Supertramp

    5 Better Than Love, Griffin House

    6 Time Has Told Me, Nick Drake

    7 5 Years Time, Noah & The Whale

    8 A Hazy Shade of Winter, Simon & Garfunkel

    9 Shower The People, James Taylor

    10 After The Storm, Mumford & Sons

    11 Re:Stacks, Bon Iver

    12 Ho Hey, The Lumineers

    13 The Scientist, Coldplay

    14 Silver Coin, Angus & Julia Stone

    15 The Gambler, Kenny Rogers

    Songs For a Lost Love

    Disc 2

    1 Let Her Go, Passenger

    2 Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood, Nina Simone

    3 If You Leave, OMD

    4 Go Your Own Way, Fleetwood Mac

    5 Crash, The Primitives

    6 Under Pressure, Queen & David Bowie

    7 Love Is a Stranger, Eurythmics

    8 Piece of My Heart, Janis Joplin

    9 Cold As Ice, Foreigner

    10 Rolling in the Deep, Adele

    11 Fuck the Pain Away, Peaches

    12 Never Going Back Again, Fleetwood Mac

    13 Somebody That I Used to Know, Gotye

    14 I Still Care for You, Ray LaMontagne

    15 Feeling Good, Nina Simone